Hello brothers and sons, Heeeeey papi. I write this post from my heart to yours.
People try to make self-love a very feminine thing when really it is for all human beings. Practising self-love comes in different ways. It could be by intentionally having a self-care routine. It could be in the form of regular affirmations or even being kind and gentle with yourself. Whichever way you practice it, please make sure you show yourself some love. Stand in front of the mirror if you have to and affirm yourself. Remind yourself that you are good looking, you are a big deal and you can be anything you want to be.
In the affirmations, you should include, ‘this D is royalty.’ (I don’t say that😂!) Women everywhere are being told to respect their bodies and not sleep with everything and anything that comes their way. I think as a man, you should too. Respect your body, learn to say no. Plus I don’t believe in ‘it’s just sex!’ I think you give something every time you sleep with a different person. Eventually, all those years of forming a connection with everyone will catch up with you.
You will always see posts like, ‘girls like a man who…’ or ‘men who ____ are very attractive’ but that shouldn’t determine who you are or what you do. Clean up and smell good because it is basic hygiene. Hit the gym and dress well because you want to look good not because some girl thinks it is attractive. Be your motivation before expecting anyone else to motivate you.
Live within your means. Don’t drown in debt trying to please the streets in the name of drip and ‘the good life.’ If you can afford it do it but if you can’t, work towards it. Please stay clean and legal while at it. Eventually, you will be able to afford all the things you want. I almost forgot, you don’t have to buy the drinks if you don’t have the money. Spare your fuliza.
If you want to sponsor your girls to everything you can do it but know that you are not obliged to send anyone fare or buy their hair. Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that you should be mean or stingy. I am just saying, don’t stress yourself trying to provide for people you just met when you don’t have enough for yourself. If you are willing and able though, by all means, spoil her. Bear in mind that she doesn’t owe you anything for everything you give her.
Relationships should be both ways. Abuse can be both ways too. Be aware of what your partner does to you. What they say and how they treat you. If in any way you are being abused or ill-treated, choose you. Speak up about it and let her know how you feel. If that doesn’t work, please leave without hurting or killing anyone. Keep your relationships healthy at all times.
Normalize feeling your feelings. Get what I’m saying? Be in touch with your emotions. Know what makes you happy or sad. Observe how you act in different situations. Master yourself and your emotions as well. That is called Emotional Intelligence (EQ) and it is as important as your IQ.
Focus on yourself. Heal wounds from your past, face your traumas, seek help when you need to and protect your personal space. You don’t have to thug through everything! Make sure you are always learning a new skill. Sign up for online courses, attend seminars on things that interest you, visit new places and always try new things. It keeps you open-minded and continuously learning.
You might wonder, from where is all these coming from? I want the men around me to be empowered as well and to know better. I want papi to be able to draw the line and care for himself before anyone else, not in a selfish way but as one that loved himself before loving me and others.
That’s it from me this week.
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//Till next time✌🏽//
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