Ok, that is an exaggeration!!
Maybe this is an apology or me trying to defend myself but irrizwaririz!
I was thinking the other day, I find peace in solitude, so much that having people around me unsettles me! Don’t get me wrong, I acknowledge that interacting with people is good for me. I however feel like I have very limited ‘socializing’ in me. It’s not people that I don’t want around me or talking to me, it’s more time to myself that I want. Make sense?
I dislike when people often use the word introvert to mean shy or without confidence! Before I discovered ambiverts, I was an introvert not because I was shy. When I need to engage with people, like in school, work or at events, I am able to do it. With proper preparation, I am able to be around crowds and generally groups of people. Over time though, I get exhausted and want to leave or stop actively interacting with people and only observe them. It feels like my social battery dies and I need to recharge it by not engaging anymore.
With friendships and relationships in general, it becomes a little troublesome. It is expected to talk more with friends and family but I am unable to do constant calls, long calls for that matter. If I do, I get tired over time. And it’s not just calls, texting feels the same for me. I literally take a social media break every weekend- by Saturday afternoon, if not Friday evening to Monday mid-morning. I often find myself looking for my phone at night and only then do I realize I haven’t touched it the whole day! It feels freeing but at the same time, I am always feeling guilty when a friend is always the one reaching out.
That said, I pass off as disinterested or snobby many times. (I have been called a snobb before!!) Then I tell myself that I am going to change my ways and I try for a few days or weeks but it feels really tiring and not peaceful so I go back to my usual ways. At this point, I am tempted to make peace with myself and define what interacting with people looks like for me but before I do, does anybody have any tips for me? Or a therapist or support group? Just anything that may help!!
That’s it from me this week.
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See you again on Friday at 10.00 a.m. EAT
//Till next time✌🏽//
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